How the Democratic Nominee Can win in 2020: the politics of the metaphorical knife fight

I usually don’t bring politics into this site. However, I’m deluded by a sobering unanimity of climate scientists into believing that our species faces, at best, chronic natural resource warfare and seasonal mass migration and, at worst, extinction if we don’t act in international collaboration (note: we won’t). And it still might be too late to prevent the lattermost. Moreover, I’m a brown dude born in the exotic city of Burbank, California, and it’s now conceivable that mass rallies of American citizens can be chanting “Send him back!” based upon my skin color and the content of my political discourse. Hence, I must ask the question: why don’t the useful instincts of a back alley knife-fighter exist in any of Donald’s potential Democratic presidential opponents for 2020?

My brother, David, is not my biological brother but a sort of brother in spirit. He is a remarkably intelligent, honest, self-aware, and forbearing man. However, I pity anyone who chooses to fuck with him. He knows how to and when to fight dirty. He is the consummate metaphorical knife fighter—-a man of peace who would be a formidable opponent for anyone who crosses him. Today, David and I were at my home and talking about how a 2020 Democratic Presidential candidate can possibly win. To me, the answer is obvious: fight a different way than before. Adapt to the opponent. Do whatever it takes to win.

I opined that, any effective candidate should casually, routinely, clearly, and repetitively refer to Trump in derogatory ways that are catchy to the angry liberal mass electorate. After all, Donald is the wielder of such name-calling weapons as “Crooked Hillary”, “Sleepy Joe”, etc. The winning Democratic candidate should never call Trump: “The President” or “Mr. Trump”. He or she must refer to Trump in one of four ways (to his face, to the media, in debates, anytime, anywhere): Traitor Trump, Putin’s Pet, Daffy Donald, or Corporal Bone Spur. The lattermost is David’s creation.

The point is: as much a civil discourse elevates our national consciousness, our current President routinely just prattles on with petty and inappropriately demeaning nicknames that seem to enliven his fascist voting base. So it follows that a bully who hits below the belt should get stabbed in the balls (this is all metaphorical for any government officials happening to be reading this. . .I do not ever endorse physical violence toward our government’s leaders or anyone unless it’s in self-defense). Digression: are we in a position of having to defend ourselves? It’s just a question. I in no way condone or support physical violence. Ever. ;)

Anyway: we’ll maximize our chances of winning the upcoming election if the Name-Caller-in-Chief is also repetitively called demeaning names in public during the 2020 contest by his opponent.

In metaphorical terms only, when a fight has to happen, you’d best fight to win. And if you’re caught in a back alley in a knife fight with an opponent who fights dirty and fights to win at all costs, well then you had better fight dirty as well and fight to win. Here’s to Traitor Trump, Putin’s Pet, Daffy Donald, and Corporal Bone Spur! Now: does anyone in the Democratic field of candidates have the street smarts to follow this winning strategy of degenerative rhetoric? (Wait: don’t answer this question…I suspect the honest answer is too discouraging.)